Archive for December, 2005

The only conversations that end with “hello?”

Mobile phones are getting smaller and smaller and smaller until one day they will just be pin head sized brain implants. 

Now look here, even on Star Trek they had hand sized communications units. I mean how small does your phone have to be? Are they bought in direct proportion to dick size? If so how big is Spock’s cock? And if that’s a Bluetooth Uhura has in her ear what does that imply for intergalatic penis envy?

What’s more mobiles are bloody ugly (just like cocks)…so go to “hulger” and buy yourself a Bluetooth adapted handset to connect to your ugly little silver box of flashing lights. These handsets communicate directly with your mobile if you don’t have Bluetooth you can get an adapter cable to connect to your mobile.

So when you are on the train and you get a call from your personal stylist you can whip this hand set out and reply to all calls with elegance, style and wit.

www.hulger.com

Music Player

TBC – FAO - ASAP – FYI- ETC!

 

Put your John Bull hat on… 12 and 13 of February it’s the “To Be Confirmed” street fashion trade show… held in the most atmospheric of Victorian era warehouse spaces in Tobacco Dock East London.

 
In the summer the tube bombs kept the crowds away but this winter the show expects to be rammed, with nearly 200 brands from Addict to Z-Brand.

 
Unlike Bread and Butter you can register on line and as long as you can back up your claim to be head of fashion for “The Little Hampton Women’s Institute Newsletter” with a business card you can go for free…if you register now there are also great half price offers on local hotels…nice.

 
I will be there and I will be wearing a church of the SubGenius badge so if you spot me and say to me: “You are feeding me cool! And I want some more right now, now I tell you! That’s it in my mouth now! Ooh yeah now, now!” 

 
Then you will win a great prize worth, Oooh! I dunno 5 quid…

 
http://www.tbc-fao.com

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When we were Kings

“I’m so mean I make medicine sick”

 

This is the greatest film ever made about boxing; it just rocks in every way. Leon Gast shot the film in 1974 in and around the great “Rumble in the Jungle” between Ali and Forman.

 

Because of some wrangling or another it sat on a shelf for 30 years. Finally, he managed to obtain the rights and made a scintillating film that mixes music, sport, politics and comedy.

 

The record of this fight is stunning – the music of James Brown and BB King features because alongside the fight a concert was organised with African and American artists.

 

Every body thought Ali would lose apart, that is, from Ali. And really how could he lose, the man is was a genius. This is a beautiful film that shows that not all documentaries have to be boring like they are on the telly. And you know what ? It  only cost £2.99 in HMV.

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